Recent teen suicides

pandora

Silver Member
#1
I am so saddened to read about the recent teen suicides across the country. It appears that most of them are due to bullying. I just can't believe the sheer number in the past few weeks!
 
N

nycanoli

Guest
#2
I am so saddened to read about the recent teen suicides across the country. It appears that most of them are due to bullying. I just can't believe the sheer number in the past few weeks!
Indeed, it is very sad. There is some very bad parenting out there that breeds this kind of behavior.
 

Golfer Girl

Triple Platinum
#3
Bullying is a huge issue and problem. Too bad most schools don't see it or choose not to see it. Now much of the bullying is done on the internet or via text message.
 
#4
Indeed, it is very sad. There is some very bad parenting out there that breeds this kind of behavior.
After witnessing a few events over the last week, I firmly believe that this behavior (in some kids) is a direct result of parents who act the same way. It's quite sad actually.
 

Tooleman

Diamond Member
#5
Actually I dont see Bullying as the problem..

the problem are the kids doing the suicides..

Being bullied in my opinion is a good thing, it teaches you some real life lessons and you need to learn how to deal with it.. I had my fair share as a kid, and I didnt go kill myself.. I just had to learn how to deal with it..
 

TXJohn1117

Double Platinum
#6
Actually I dont see Bullying as the problem..

the problem are the kids doing the suicides..
I kind of have to agree with Toolie on this one. There has always been bullying and there always will be, but there hasn't always been this rash of suicides. I was bullied by a guy for a while in jr. high school. Rather than doing myself in I finally stopped it by knocking him on his a**. I think that a lot parents today coddle their kids rather than preparing them for the world. I think the helicopter mom syndrome has a lot to do with it.
 

Tooleman

Diamond Member
#7
Yup my parents tough me that lesson too when I was a kid..

My Dad told me, this guy used to bully him everyday.. So one day he had enough and he punched him in the face..

He told me, I dont want you to fight.. But if you get suspended from school because you took care of a bully I wouldn't be grounded..

And yes I did get suspended for fighting, but getting a couple days off schools is a lot better then dying in my opinion..
 

pearceg

Diamond Member
#8
I think that a lot parents today coddle their kids rather than preparing them for the world. I think the helicopter mom syndrome has a lot to do with it.
Then there are the schools with their fixation on self-esteem and being more concerned if Johnny feels dumb than if Johnny is dumb. Too many kids don't know what to do when they're confronted with a situation where they don't get a trophy and certificate just for showing up.
 
#9
it really is terrible but like others have said....bullying wasnt just invented. in fact, now it is a HUGE thing the schools "teach". hell my 2nd grader has a "dont be a bully" song he sings that he learned at school. imho the biggest problem is the other kids. while i dont think bullying teaches "life lessons" i do think its a part of life just like success and failures. the majority of the bad parenting goes on the shoulders of those kids...if they havent been taught how to deal with bad things in life. i was a high schooler in DFW in the 80's and there were tons of suicides....it was almost like a fad there for a bit.

again, just an opinion and not to take away from the sadness of the whole ordeal.
 
#10
I am not a parent but I was bullied like everyone else. Bullying has been going on for MANY generations, it is not anything new though I'm not sure I'd claim it's a healthy experience either.. I blame the emphasis on self esteem and feelings. I also wonder if it could have something to do with overprescribing medication and less exercise/sun but I'm not really qualified to comment much on that...

ray
 

mommyx2

Diamond Member
#12
But at what point does the bullying go beyond life lessons?

We had an issue this year that was completely beyond what I call something to teach my DD a life lesson. Luckily the school took the threat seriously and dealt with it quickly.

There are new policies this year in FISD for bullying. I would highly recommend going to the programs that are being held at the various schools (I know elementary level) and see the levels thay have set and the consequences that go with it... there are some that I do not see as bullying and it could really catch a "good kid"...
 

angelaN

Platinum Member
#14
Do any of the above adults happen to be parents to a child with developmental delays???

Our kids are prime victims for bullies.

OK maybe bullying happens and kids need to toughen up. Maybe bullies should pick on their equals!! They don't pick on their equals because they need to feel superior so they need to pick on someone who doesn't have have what it takes to stand up for themselves.

It is a tough world out there but ignoring bullying is not the solution to preparing children for the real world.
 

TXJohn1117

Double Platinum
#15
Do any of the above adults happen to be parents to a child with developmental delays???

Our kids are prime victims for bullies.

OK maybe bullying happens and kids need to toughen up. Maybe bullies should pick on their equals!! They don't pick on their equals because they need to feel superior so they need to pick on someone who doesn't have have what it takes to stand up for themselves.

It is a tough world out there but ignoring bullying is not the solution to preparing children for the real world.
No one said to ignore it. The consensus was that too many kids are ill equipped to deal with it. Bullys usually are cowards and standing up to them, maybe with a little force, will usually be enough to stop it.

If there is a kid that is truly vicious, then yes there needs to be more intervention.
 
#16
It's my hope there aren't parents out there sending their kids out into the world with a duty to help other kids "grow a backbone" through bullying. I should think that teaching kids to show compassion to their fellow human beings and expecting it in return would be more important than my kid getting beat up by some bully in order to toughen up and prepare for life. There are so many other disappointments and obstacles that many of them have to deal with that will teach them the tough lessons.

I talk to my kids and tell them to before doing anything that could be harmful or hurtful to ask themselves this question; "How would I feel if someone treated my mom, dad, brother, sister, grandparents, in this way?" I also tell them that there is NO problem earth that they can't come to me and talk it out. We'll figure it out.

Anyway, I'd rather be idealistic than cynical, but I'm not really either. I wouldn't wish bullying upon anyone (adult or child). Like the OP, I was really disturbed by the recent rash of suicides. There is no justification for that type of bullying behavior.
 

TXJohn1117

Double Platinum
#17
It's my hope there aren't parents out there sending their kids out into the world with a duty to help other kids "grow a backbone" through bullying. I should think that teaching kids to show compassion to their fellow human beings and expecting it in return would be more important than my kid getting beat up by some bully in order to toughen up and prepare for life. There are so many other disappointments and obstacles that many of them have to deal with that will teach them the tough lessons.

I talk to my kids and tell them to before doing anything that could be harmful or hurtful to ask themselves this question; "How would I feel if someone treated my mom, dad, brother, sister, grandparents, in this way?" I also tell them that there is NO problem earth that they can't come to me and talk it out. We'll figure it out.

Anyway, I'd rather be idealistic than cynical, but I'm not really either. I wouldn't wish bullying upon anyone (adult or child). Like the OP, I was really disturbed by the recent rash of suicides. There is no justification for that type of bullying behavior.
What??? I think you need to go back and re-read the thread with a little more comprehension. Who said to teach their kids to be a bully? This thread is about standing up to a bully. That's the life's lesson. Life isn't always easy and there are people out there that will do you harm. Growing a backbone is realizing that mommy or daddy aren't always going to be there to protect you and you'll have to stand up to bullies on your own.
 

GoodAg

Double Platinum
#18
I think one of the problems with modern-day bullying is that the victim doesn't get a break from it. Nowadays bullies continue school stuff online, through social websites, etc. It can get overwhelming when it's non-stop.

I remember a couple of kids I could have done without in school, but I would always think, "Well, if I can make it to the end of the day I can go home and get away from them." Unfortunately, that doesn't happen now with the web-world all around them.
 

Brian

Diamond Member
#19
Bullying does teach you life lessons.. It teaches you to grow a backbone and get things taken care of..
Why do you cry when I post about you? You going to punch me in the head?

Toole.. when will you wise up, ever? I doubt it.


The issue isn't bullying. Yes, it's been around forever. The issue is that the internet exposes it to a much larger audience in a much faster timeframe. I guess toole the psychologist forgot to mention that part.

The real issue is that people actually agree with toole... avoid the real issue and take the stupid approach.
 
#20
What??? I think you need to go back and re-read the thread with a little more comprehension. Who said to teach their kids to be a bully? This thread is about standing up to a bully. That's the life's lesson. Life isn't always easy and there are people out there that will do you harm. Growing a backbone is realizing that mommy or daddy aren't always going to be there to protect you and you'll have to stand up to bullies on your own.
You do realize that some kids simply are not equipped to stand up to bullies on their own? This is a fact of life, not a gauge on whether or not they are inferior human beings or unable to navigate life. I got the old "they hit you, you hit 'em back" speech, too, and I've told my kids the same. However, I do believe that acting as if bullying is a great life lesson, so deal with it, is giving too much of a pass to the bullies. People get all ate up saying that kids are overprotected these days and it is sometimes true. However, sometimes things that you *think* you see really aren't that way at all. There are children out there (like AngelaN mentioned and I am the mother of one, also) who can't stand up for themselves. I'm not ready to give a pass to a bully. I don't give a crap how great of a life lesson it could be. I wasn't surprised that people would begin a chorus of "Get over it. Be tough." And my post wasn't aimed at you, btw. ;)

I meant to mention what Brian is saying....the internet has done things for bullying the likes of which NONE of us ever saw, growing up.
 
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